Wondering about Money : What stories are playing out in your present day from your past?
What are your money stories? Money stories are repetitive plots that play themselves out over and over in your finances, until you shift your perspective to see things in a different way.
Maybe you are living out the long standing BS that has been running in your family for centuries. Like it or not, unconscious financial patterns can live on through us without examination. Hint: Can you think of any common phrases your family uses to talk about money? Or worse - does your family NEVER talk about money, leaving it in a shroud of shame? Look to your family history for clues to your ancestral money stories.
Perhaps your money story starts on the playground with other kids in school. I know my very first financial venture left me with a lot of confused feelings around money that only surfaced much later in my life when I started running my own business.
When I was in elementary school, I rode the school bus from my farm to school. This made me a "farm kid" and the rules of the school meant, no farm kid could leave the school yard at lunch time for any reason. It just so happened, that in my town a candy store existed just a few blocks from the school yard, maybe a 10 minute walk. Town kids could walk to the store and get candy but the farm kids could not. As a young entrepreneur I saw this injustice as an opportunity. I started to take orders from the farm kids, collect their money, buy candy at the lunch hour and pocket a small profit for my risk upon delivery. This candy career was profitable and fun until the principal busted me for leaving school property, some kid had ratted me out. I felt shame in the principals office for breaking the rules, and I felt the worst shame returning my classmates money, instead of the candy we had agreed on.
As an adult, when I would wonder about blocks in business or cash flow this story would move through my mind. I had many beliefs tied up in one big knot. Receiving money for goods and services brought up insecurities; fear of getting in trouble, fear of disappointing others, fear of trusting my decisions, fear of receiving, fear of not being able to deliver. Upon examination, I discovered some faulty Belief Systems fueling my emotions.
"Money brings trouble."
"Others don't want me to succeed."
"It is shameful to make money."
"I can't hold onto things"
Can you think of your early interactions with money? Have you considered that some fairly mundane stories from your childhood act like filters on the reality of money in your adult life? Based on my story above can you see how I may subconsciously push money away from me because I don't want to risk losing friendships, trust or even esteem from people I look up to? Even though this story is totally true it is still BS if I let it block me. I could continue to believe these faulty perceptions, or I could question this story with a curious mind.
What if instead of believing money would bring me trouble I considered money bringing me peace?
What if instead of believing others don't want me to succeed I considered that it doesn't really matter what others think of my success?
What if instead of believing it is shameful to make money, I considered that making money can be honorable and an honor?
What if instead of believing I can't hold onto things I considered some things are beyond my control and that's ok?
Want to try wondering about your own money story?
Think of a reoccurring money story in your life. Feel the feelings the money story brings up for you. Look for clues regarding deeper belief systems. Be curious about your thinking. What are the benefits you redeem from sticking to this story? Is the benefit worth holding onto the belief?
Reoccurring money story: I live paycheck to paycheck.
Feeling: It feels scary, draining and endless.
Belief: "I can't save money."
Benefits: If I believe I can't save money, it means I don't have to try to save money. Basically believing "I can't save money" means I get to spend all my money. I can be lazy with saving.
Wonder: Why is it worth it more to me to spend my money than save it? Why is being lazy with my money more important to me than saving?
Look for new awareness. Make decisions and take action in your financial life that are in alignment with your truth. Create space in your life for the kind of relationship you really want with your money.
Details about our next Free Group Session - Wonder with us about money!
Date: Jan 5th 2017 from 10:00am to 10:30m PST
To register: email us at firstname.lastname@example.org with the subject line - Group Wondering Jan 5th. This event will be conducted on zoom!
This zoom session will be recorded so if you can't attend live, we can send you the recording. If you feel uncomfortable on camera you are welcome to tune in without video.
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